February 24, 2013

8 - Amour (2012)


Many years ago, my mother as she began dealing with issues related to aging began her mantra, "There are worse things than dying young." As her group of friends experienced health decline, the mantra came more and more. Later, watching my best friend's parents dealing with their issues taught me my mother was right. I remember helping my friend's mother out of a wheelchair being afraid because she felt so frail. When I got her in bed, she looked at me, smiled and said, "You didn't hurt me." Apparently some of her other caregivers hadn't been as thoughtful.

I could not help but think of my friends parents as I was watching Amour. In it Georges and Anne, an elderly active couple who are able to function in their are suddenly confronted with Anne has a stroke while sitting at breakfast. Through the film Anne has more and more strokes and goes from functioning on her own to being completely incapacitated. The film details the couple's struggles, from getting her out of a wheelchair to feeding her to trying to understand when she begins reverting to childhood memories. Near the end, she keeps repeating, "hurts, hurts," which one caregiver says is just an unconscious verbal response to which Georges should not pay attention.

Georges and Anne, portrayed beautifully and horrifyingly realistically by Jean-Louis Trintignant and Emmanuele Riva, have lived a life of quiet polite companionship. She taught piano, but now cannot play. We read Anne's decline and heartbreak in their faces. They find they cannot even talk about their fears. Georges begins having realistic dreams filled with his fears as he contemplates an end we have seen at the beginning of the film. Trintignant and Riva's performances are shatteringly real. Having enjoyed their work in their youth and seeing the film ravages of age adds another dimension to the work.

The mood of the film is set at the beginning. No sound track, black screen, titles in white. The first sound we are confronted with is firemen breaking open the apartment door. The rest, except the very end, is flashback. The silent ending was greeted by a universal exhaling of the audience.

The film feels both personal and autobiographical. For all its realism and heartfelt pathos for the two, it becomes excruciating to experience. Having watched closely people dealing with these same issues, I found it difficult to relive in closeup on the screen. By the end of the film, the elegant open French apartment became a prison from which I also wanted to escape. Although it is beautifully done and superbly acted, I had to fight not walking out many times.

Dylan Thomas was right in advising,
Do not go gentle into that dark night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Amour (2012) ****


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